Newspapers B6 edition

[Masumi]

An unsurprising runaway leader in lockpicking...

Top Lockpickers (Breath)
Character
Locks Picked
1.) Set o Lockpicks 85
2.) a pink cocker spaniel 1
3.) Character Name 0
4.) Doc Snuggles 0
5.) EugeneKay 0
6.) CHAOS CHAOS CHAOS 0
7.) A Murderous Ice Cream Truck 0
8.) Baalhrezem 0
9.) Sefah Wefcas 0
10.) Spinosaurus 0

[erikune]

You shall never lock me out of any houses!

- Set o Lockpicks, professional lockpicker

[kylinn]

Let It Be Known that the Kingdom of Grand Aberloch celebrates today the occasion of the one-hundredth year of the reign of our sovereign King Raphael of the House of Aberloch, third of his name, Final Arbiter of Matters of Honor, Defender of the Sacred Flames and true heir of the throne of his mother Queen Evelyne.

He is the sixty-seventh in the illustrious line of his House since it was begun by the crimson light of its first mother, the Goddess Batet, and the zeal of its first father, Saint Arrius of Aberloch. May he live forever.

The full peerage of the Realm will be in attendance, save those with immediate duties in the wars against the hordes on the Eastern Marches and those fighting the rebellion across the seas to restore our Sovereign's rightful claim to the Throne of the Mattermark.

Top Infusers (Career)
1.) your doppelgänger 77,860
2.) Ohm von Blackvolt- Hertz 71,789
3.) Fedayeen 65,088
4.) Thaddeus Ilýsio 64,790
5.) AT&T Customer Service 58,934
6.) Thane 55,822
7.) Vee 52,091
8.) Edward D. Cope 48,957
9.) William Corvinus 46,893
10.) Tadpole- A Tree climbing Catfish 46,617

[kylinn]

Let It Be Known that Count Michel of Ketterfield, twenty-fourth of his line, and Duke Roger of Whitemount, fortieth of his line, have arranged the betrothal of Theodora of Ketterfield, firstborn daughter and anointed heir of the Keys of Ketterfield, and Sir Hugh of Whitemount, second son of his illustrious father.

Theodora of Ketterfield is currently serving gallantly as the newly appointed Commander of the Royal Signal Corps for the Bastion Fleet. Sir Hugh of Whitemount is currently deployed as a Knight-Lieutenant of the illustrious Marduk Battalion, in the victorious war of the realm against the hordes to the East. The Keeper of the Royal Heraldry wishes them well and looks forward to the announcement of their marriage in the future.

Top Crafters (Career)
1.) Erehlim 23,593
2.) Acobi 8,473
3.) Lucky Cat 6,099
4.) Father Christmas 5,909
5.) Vee 5,187
6.) Macath 4,965
7.) Andrew 4,942
8.) Deathpoint 4,795
9.) Mrs Elena Barton 4,512
10.) Athru 4,453

[kylinn]

Let It Be Known that Bertrand of Garnier, third son of Guillaume of Garnier the seventh of his line, has distinguished himself greatly in battle against the woeful hordes on the Eastern Marches, piloting his Gargoyle alongside such worthies as our late much-beloved Duke Rene of Lac-Saigneuse, the Lord Commander of the Ruby Guard, and the Royal Knights of Ukko Battalion.

Per the hand of our gracious Duchess Renee of Lac-Saigneuse, Bertrand of Garnier has been named to the knighthood of the Order of Saint Damon and is henceforth known as Sir Bertrand of Garnier. Long may his excellent service in the ranks of Adonis Battalion continue.

Top Punching Bags (Breath)
1.) JANITORBOT 4,437
2.) Lord Anonymous of 4Chan 2,855
3.) Scribalist 2,558
4.) Placeholder 2,349
5.) Cerce 1,836
6.) Vee 1,758
7.) ManBearPig 1,703
8.) Chika 1,664
9.) Inara Serra 1,661
10.) Edghould 1,661

[kylinn]

Let It Be Known that White Gold Estate, chartered to House Montesque of Silver Isle, has released the Century Vintage. Sir Alistair of the Narrows, vintner of the White Gold and seventh of that line and title, announced the vintage at a ceremony at Montesque Manor on the occasion of our Sovereign's hundredth year of his worthy reign.

White Gold Estate has a long and storied history of the realm's finest wines, and House Montesque wishes Peer investors to know that they are part of a legacy of centuries of greatness.

Top Demon Killers (Career)
1.) Pharaoh 3,205
2.) Plum 2,415
3.) Inanna 2,122
4.) a horse with no name 1,847
5.) Bob Ross 1,581
6.) Skull Face 1,546
7.) Liemannen 1,386
8.) Jabberwock 1,283
9.) Spinosaurus 1,275
10.) Coron 1,259

[erikune]

Let It Be Known that Grandstone Extractions, chartered to House Grandstone, is pleased to announce the discovery of rich sources of vital Uranium in their holdings in the Marlin Coast. Dame Margeurite of the Rivermouth, chair of Grandstone Extractions, made the announcement on the tenth of the month at the board meeting on Sovereign's Day.

The Potosi Mine has already enjoyed five years of abundant returns, and House Grandstone wishes to inform Peer investors that as always, your money is in good hands.

Top Readers (Career)
1.) Kargoth 16,815
2.) Tiger Fist 10,408
3.) Badziew 9,999
4.) Sentient Spellbook 9,673
5.) Pilgrim 9,343
6.) Molovian 6,281
7.) a trojan cat 5,952
8.) Scarbrand 4,472
9.) Nharacter Came 4,109
10.) Amtherion 4,064

[squib]

Let It Be Known that Countess Jeanne of Ketterfield, twenty-third of his line and keeper of Kingsport, has perished in battle, striking boldly against the rabble in rebellion in a place called New Thetis, which stands between our Kingdom and the reclamation of the Mattermark. Strong was her will and great was her leadership of the Order of Saint Damon.

She is succeeded by her son and chosen heir Michel of Ketterfield, who has taken up the mantle of his ancestors by renewing the fealty of Kingsport before the Duchess Renee of Lac-Saigneuse in a ceremony witnessed by the knights, guilds and chartered orders of the City. Long may he keep the Keys.

Top Readers (Breath)
Character
Books Read
1.) Dreldarr 289
2.) Allison Wolf 279
3.) Joy 278
4.) Amtherion 267
5.) dilbertini 266
6.) Adonaios 264
7.) Operator 223
8.) Maelstrom 222
9.) Pharnox 217
10.) Mr. Cards 216

Let It Be Known that on the third day of the coming month, the Order of the Stars has deemed it fortuitous for the Feast of Ankharis, in memory of those fallen and in celebration of the heroes to come.

The Procession is to begin at dawn at the Rosewood Columbarium, with the Priestess of Ankharis overseeing the candlelight proceedings. A performance of the War in the Heavens is to be held at the Theater of the Air at dusk, to which worthies of the realm are bidden to attend by the grace of the keeper of Kingsport, Count Michel of Ketterfield.

Top Transcended Killers (Breath)
Character
Transcended Killed
1.) A Burning Man 30
2.) Mousia 30
3.) Solo-Raiding Void Walker 29
4.) Liberia Crystal 27
5.) Officer Robinson 26
6.) Fractions Frog 25
7.) Shaidar Haran 25
8.) Vashta Nerada 24
9.) Trurl 24
10.) DRACULA MUMMY 24

[MrFrank]

Most Killed Characters (Breath)
Character
No. of Deaths
1.) Lord Anonymous of 4Chan 527
2.) Placeholder 463
3.) MC Hammer 449
4.) Scribalist 322
5.) Geneviève Ghyslaine 247
6.) Elska Skapraun 239
7.) JANITORBOT 216
8.) Annie Baker 175
9.) Cnaiür urs Skiötha 117
10.) Gerry 105

[erikune]

Top Infusers (Breath)
Character
Infusion Achieved
1.) Hex 1,148
2.) Seventh 1,087
3.) Pharaoh 1,052
4.) Takeda 1,037
5.) Satch 1,010
6.) Finn 999
7.) Badar 999
8.) Forgotten Toad 989
9.) Nikolett 988
10.) Mousus 986